March 22, 2004

This Had Better Be Good

Late in the fall of 1996, I knew it was time to leave Santa Fe. I sat down to decide where I was going to move. The choice was wide open. I could move anywhere I desired. I began offering choices to my inner guidance. I asked if Boulder, Colorado would be a good place to move? The answer was no.

I asked if Durango, Colorado or Aspen would work for me? The answer was no. I asked if Sedona or Flagstaff, Arizona would be good places to move? No, no. I asked about Carmel, California and the Big Sur country? The answer was no. I asked about Eugene, Oregon, or one of the beautiful coastal towns of Oregon, or Bend or Ashland, Oregon? The answer was no for every one of these places.

Okay, I thought, how about Puget Sound or Seattle or the San Juan Islands? No, no, no. Perhaps, somewhere in Idaho or Montana? No , no again. I kept trying. Burlington, Vermont? No. Asheville, North Carolina? No. Somewhere in the Ozarks? No. Austin, Texas? No. I offered other choices. The answer always came back no.

Finally, in desperation and frustration, I asked about moving back to Kansas City? The answer was yes! Oh, no! You must not have understood the question. You want to me to move back to Kansas City? Yes. But I've already been there. The response was, Yes, but that is where you need to go, and as soon as possible.

But that means moving to the Midwest in the middle of winter. (Do you get the idea that I was a reluctant sell on this proposal?) How about if I wait till May or June when the weather is nice? No. You must go to Kansas City now.

All right, but this had better be good.

I moved to Kansas City late in December of 1996. Through more inner guidance, I was led quickly to a neurologist, who discovered that I did not have multiple sclerosis, but a spinal cord tumor. In early February of 1997 a wonderfully talented neurosurgeon, Dr. Geoffrey Blatt, removed the tumor. Dr. Blatt later told me the tumor had progressed so far, that without surgery I would have had at the most three or four months to live.

If I had waited to have my inner dialogue about moving, waited to move, moved anywhere else, not called the neurologist who was recommended to me, or waited to call her, I would have died in the spring of 1997. Seven years later I am tumor free and have a normal life expectancy. Holy Cow! Moving back to Kansas City saved my life. I still get chills when I think how close I came to dying in the spring of '97.

The voice of inner guidance may go by many names--intuition, inner wisdom, your higher self, God, an angel, Great Spirit, a spirit guide. Whatever that still quiet voice is to you, please listen.

 

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